Unemployed Man Gets Blackberry

Kenosha, WI – In an attempt to appear busy, out of work cheese factory employee Dennis Wykhoff has upgraded his mobile phone to a Blackberry.  “People with jobs have Blackberries,” Dennis said.  “I figure if I have the phone, the job will follow.  Also, I can check Facebook everywhere now!”

Dennis doing something useless

Dennis’ friends report that he is constantly on the phone.  “He says that he’s checking emails and looking at stocks,” said ex-coworker James Gilbert. “Who the hell is emailing him?  He’s just updating Facebook or tweeting something nobody cares about.” James added,  “All I know is that he always puts that damn thing on the bar when we go out for drinks and stares at it instead of shooting the shit with us.  It’s made him a drone.”  Dennis does not want to hear any criticism of his potentially poor fiscal decision.  “What were you saying?  I just got a BBM.”

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